Category Archives: Randomness

…and there you have it!

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I felt like writing today…welp that’s a change.  I even felt like writing a book working on an idea but have to flesh it out.

I’ve been sick, so sick I went to my own ER and got seen.  I have to say as much as I love *some* of the docs I work with it would seem some just don’t know shit.  LOL.  I can laugh about it now but at the time it was frustrating and painful.  THEN had to rush El Syd to the ER the next morning in the early AM because she couldn’t breathe.  Now that’s an EMERGENCY but I will say my ER did the damn thing they were great.

I have had constipation that is driving me insane.  I’m sitting on the commode trying to make magic happen as I type this (how’s that for TMI!)  Drank some coffee this morning hoping to jump start a few things.

I haven’t been working out like I should.  No excuse just lazy.

I have been working on my federal resume little by very little.  I think fear of being trapped in my current job is holding me back.  My Plan A consists of getting hired in a federal position and leaving the ER behind.  If that doesn’t pan out I fear I will be stuck, even though logically I know God works it out in his own time.  I just really hate my job, but it’s mine and I feel okay for the most part even though I hate it…did I mention I hate it?  Yep I do.

So what else can I talk about?  Let’s see…The Teenager is 21 now…geez that’s old.  We are planning a family gathering in July which makes me so very anxious.  LOL.

and there you have it, there’s so much more but I think I’m off to drink more coffee and pray for poop!

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It’s official I’m sick.  I hate being sick, and I can’t BE sick this coming week because I’ll get sent home from clinical.  *sigh*

I have so many things I need to be doing but alas I’m not doing them, not because I’m sick but because I just don’t want to.

I’m drinking green tea with agave nectar (spiked with captain morgan’s spiced rum) it doesn’t taste good but I’m hoping to pass out later.  That’s a win.

It’s late and we still haven’t had dinner.  The mister knows I’m sick and I haven’t been to the store, the kids are hungry  and I’m hungry and I don’t want a FUCKING PB&J sammich!

Cynical Me

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I recently  joined a message board for military wives.  I wanted to get some info on our new assignment (didn’t get much).  The vibe on the board is really cool for the most part.

I suppose being in the military for over a decade has made me cynical…jaded.  As I read the different posts I find myself shaking my head and tsk tsking.

One lady asked for advice…she had been inappropriate with a friend while her boyfriend was deployed…these folks TORE HER ASS UP!!! I stopped reading the thread after the first couple of pages but there were at least 14 pages of finger wagging last I checked. <insert eye roll>.  They called her weak, told her she wasn’t ready to be a military wife…that she should tell her man WHO IS IN A FUCKIN’ WAR ZONE what she had done.

I have to say I saw a lot of mischief while I was active duty. A LOT.  Some I was a part of, but most I was not.  As I read how these women are waiting (some married some not) for their SO to return to them I’m struck by how I try NOT to pity them.  MOST of the military men *I* have known have cheated in one way or another.  Whether it be emotionally or physically most have crossed that line.  The wives usually aren’t told.  The whole shop/ squadron will know and folks (myself included) aren’t saying shit!  Either the person is your friend (like a brother or a sister) or you don’t want to get in someone else’s business.  You may have to trust  your life to the same person you dimed out.  Not a place you want to find yourself residing.

As these women tore this woman down, I wanted to let them know that more than half of them DON’T know what the fuck their husband is doing in a war zone.  Over half of them will never know that woman (or man in some cases) that is smiling at you at the next squadron function is fucking your man OR knows someone else who has.  The person who is hanging out at your house for the next BBQ knows, but they aren’t breaking the code.  These women have no idea that the same men they are waiting for, know the code and will condone (through silence) their friends infidelities and misdeeds.  They have no idea.

Trust and believe I don’t put the mister on any pedestals.

Guess that makes me cynical, but I’ll never tell.

Randomness…some more

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I’m on the hunt for new music. At the moment I’m digging Rascal Flatts’ older stuff and a group called Beats Antique.

I’m thinking about G as MY day approaches and I wonder if he’s going to be a pussy about it this year.  Not going to let it break my stride either way.  Fuck you nucca!

BL is e-mailing me again. I made sure to set that shit straight out the gate. I AM where I want and need to be. I haven’t wavered from that belief.

I’m still in therapy I’m seeing SOME relief, but I know this journey is going to hurt like hell.  I miss my mama, but I’m still so angry and I feel cheated.

My big sis is coming to town this month!

My girl Thelma is about to be up and out this bitch…without me  *sigh*  Congrats girl!  *sad face*

Looks like I’m going to  be’round these parts for longer then I had hoped, but I’m looking at this as an opportunity to heal and take care of our business so we can move on to the next place in a better overall position.

Working 60hrs this week…it’s making me feel old as hell

I think when the sun makes another appearance I’m going to lay in our new hammock nekkid…I need some sun therapy

I should be in bed right now…have to go to work in 6hrs

Working nights isn’t horrible, but I miss daylight and the mister

Don’t really miss the rugrats yet, I’m enjoying the break

Started school shopping for them, SHIT I just remembered I need to price Jah’s new trumpet!  Damn…these kids stay in our pockets…snatching up coins

Why do some folks go thru life looking like a hot fucking mess.  That shit ain’t cute…comb ya head, wear some clothes that fit.  Yeah you need to stay fucking wit them silly ass white boys, cuz any brotha worth ANYTHING ain’t having that hobo/flip flop shit!

Why do folks who come to the ER have fucked up grills…I mean missing all they fronts and backs hell the sides too!

I REALLY need to get in the gym…Body Jammin’

Randomness before I hit the road!

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Yep this is going to be plenty random

I have a pimple on my butt cheek and it hurts

I think Alicia Keys is a skank for messing with and getting preggers by a married man, but I so understand the attraction of the forbidden but I will still continue to dislike her skankiness *shrug*

I think my depression is coming back

I haven’t worked out in over a month…Serena Obama?  More like Oprah O’donnell  *meh*

I don’t want to go back to school I like summer vacay

Always question your doctors and nurses and I mean always.  Make them answer your questions don’t just take their word for it…trust me on this one

I’m tried of hearing about Natalie Hollaway(?) (the white chick that went missing in Aruba)  No shade to her family but I’m sick to death of missing/dead white wimmenz getting international shine.  Brown folks can’t even get a fucking honorable mention *sigh*

My sex drive is still missing, this deadness of wanting lovin’ is getting mighty old

Guess who’s getting a Mac?  Yeppers! Me!  Any advice is appreciated!

They totaled out the mister motorcycle…we are now sticking to 4 wheels.   *YAY*

The medical folks think the mister may have MRSA!  *EWWW and YUCK*

Why did that mofo wash his busted up foot in MY sink…why did he act all butthurt when I promptly sanitized said sink with a bleach solution?  Hell I’m trying to be a medical profession, I ain’t fucking with MRSA, she’s a bad bitch!

I’m on my way to the city!  Maybe even to a real mall.  *Joy*

I still haven’t talked to my mother my heart still hurts…I keep asking myself what I’m getting out of being so silent and angry…still working on that one

My dad wants to spend time with my kids this summer

At times I feel like my brothers shouldn’t exist

I need a pedicure!

I love the mister and I’m happy we are still together (mark this day!  LOL)

The mister has to go to wound care for his busted yucky foot

I bought my mom a birthday card…I need to send it to her *sigh*

Why don’t all women get tested for STDs at their annual exam…if you’re fucking (even if you’re married) you’re still at risk.  I’m just saying.

Seems BL has dropped off the planet, at the moment(and beyond) I’m cool with that

Not sure if I’m going to wish G a happy birthday *hmmm*

SKEEVY and EWWWW

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I’m not a germaphobe.  I don’t spend my life trying to kill germs or running from them.  I’m a little crazy when it comes to people’s hands.  I don’t abide people’s hand on my stuff.  I don’t like sharing pens…but I will if I HAVE to!

My first night in the trauma center one of the RNs bought some snacks for the whole shift.  Don’t you know these medical professional all lined up and stuck their hands in a box of crackers!  I really thought I was going to pass out!  I mean there are all kinds of icky yucky stuff on those surfaces, not to mention the coochie, paynus, and bootie juice that folks carry on their hands on a daily basis.

I passed on the snacks…I brought my own.

I also noticed the night shift is like family and they are for the most part comfortable with each other, which translates into them sticking their hands in each others food to grab a taste.  I watched this happen over and over and felt a little light headed.  Ewwwww!

The patient’s weren’t the only ones suffering trauma…I was skeeved the hell out!