Life has been…happening.
I’m dealing with this and that. Haven’t even felt like writing but this morning I know it’s the lack of “pen to paper” that is causing some of my issues. I’m a writer by nature I need to write.
We are still living in the rental house. Haven’t gone out to the building site again, but will do that today. I think I may have missed the basement process for our scrapbook. Dah Well. We hopefully are finally finishing up the mortgage process today. Hopefully. I’ve gone to over the moon about building this house to just anxious. There are so many things to do for a new house. Let’s just start by how much covering the windows is going to cost us. Not complaining by ANY means, just saying… We are in our minds doing furniture placement…Jah will be getting the room with the massive closet, which seems such a waste to me. Teenage (oh ma gawd teenaged!) boys don’t care about closets, unlessen they are gay and wanting to stay in or jump out of them. I thought the bigger closet would work best for Syd but The Mister says he’s the oldest in the house and gets the bigger (not by much)d room…*sigh*
We have ordered furniture for the kid’s rooms at a price that gives me pause, but this is our long haul house and I want them to have nice things they can grow into as teenagers.
The mister and I have had a come to Jesus meeting about us. I’m still fearful of being hurt , but my new motto is… I will not let fear ruin me. I call Thelma (hey girl) and she talks me down from my madness. Not sure why everyone else can see that The Mister is in love with me and most days I can’t. Must be that whole forest for the trees thing.
J is still in the south. Wanting to move “home” with us. I’m hoping that doesn’t happen and he is successful on his own. He’s not a teenager anymore and he needs to find his way. It has to be done. It needs to be done.
Work is well, tiring. I would like to say I’m completely in love, but I know I am not. Some days I feel like my company is taking advantage of new nur.ses and other days I’m just happy to have a job. I miss my old crew, as crazy as it sounds. It was a GREAT place to work, but Lord knows I ain’t going back that way. LOL.
While Grad school has been put on hold I’m trying to stay focused on learning to BE a nurse. It’s so scary and exciting all at the same time. I’m trying to find my way and be damn good in the process.
Life is good, much better then I feel I deserve sometime (working on that)… I’m weaning off my meds, today is day two of the dizziness and nausea that comes with NOT taking them. But I when I tried to follow the PA’s instruction it didn’t work for me. I hate feeling this way and 2wks of it wasn’t going to happen. So I took the last pill and now I’m just fighting off the withdrawal. It will be worth it in the end.
So life is…happening.