Some time ago, I bought myself a nice set(s) of fingernail and toenail clippers.  I kept them in my basket next to my sink on the vanity in my bathroom.  I noticed that every time I went to clip my nails (I try never to file them) I couldn’t find them.  I would then find them around the house, in the kids rooms, on the computer desk, on the bar in the kitchen(you get the picture).  So I gathered them together and told the mister to stay out of my shit.  He would use them and leave them on the computer desk and then the rugrats would spy them and BAM…they were missing again.  Sooo I bought myself a even NICER set of clippers and placed them in the back of the top drawer of the vanity (because I know all these motherfuckers are too lazy to actually search for anything)

Sooo now the mister is walking around butt hurt because he can’t find any clippers.  He wants to use mine…FUCK YOU BITCH…I hope that hang nail gets caught on every piece of fabric you come into contact with.  I hope your toenails grow and curl up on your simple ass.  Just keep them claws on your side of the bed!

This is the very reason I tell you not to let your kids run off with shit!  But you get all Chad on me, like you ain’t know what the fuck I’m talking about…if it ain’t their’s then they shouldn’t be touching shit!

So suck a fat nut.  I ain’t lending you NATHIN’!!!!

Keep looking bitch!  BWAAAAAAH

Ya’ll should see him stomping around here looking for those clippers!

Why his simple ass just wake up our middle child asking for toenail clippers?!

Why I’m sweating like a runaway slave over here trying not to laugh out loud…whew Lord this is PRICELESS!

He ain’t going to find shit in Jah’s room!  This is so worth the price of admission!



They’ll be lost again tomorrow…so clip away while you can!  BWAAAAAAHHHHHH!


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